"oh, please. you can’t REALLY be in a great mood. there are people out there who just got raises. people just got married. people are being reunited with their families right now. how dare you say you’re happy."
The equivalent of someone saying you can’t be sad because other people have it worse than you.
tumblr makes fun of “old people on the internet” because they’re naive but then i see posts that are literally cut and paste chain emails from the 90s and everyone believes on here thinks they’re legit
"i wish i was born in the 90s" says the young girl. suddenly, her surroundings change- french flags fly above and around her, crowds are cheering. it is france, 1793. the king is dead. long live the revolution.
"average person eats 3 spiders a year" factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted
*applies to harvard as a joke* *harvard accepts me as a joke* *enrolls at harvard as a joke* *graduate with a business degree as a joke* *starts an extremely successful business as a joke* *creates empire for myself as a joke* *enters the press conference of my life* *leans close to microphone* just kidding *goes home*